Dear Diary:
I got my music on blast this afternoon,listening to,Mia X"I'll Take Ya Man",lol,I know right real gangsta tunes. I had to get hyped today after a really shitty week. Plus, I follow Mia X on twitter,I cannot stop laughing my ass off, at her talking about a lady who "fotted" on the plane,she said it "smelled like chitterlings",just straight ass "fot"lmao. I thought my tweets are interesting,but the celeb tweets are off the chain,especially LiL Mo,omy,she has me laughing on the floor,with her "messy"talk. She play cusses,she is a church diva,entertainer,but will take it to the street on you.
My weekend was totally laid back,spent it at home with the kiddie crew. I had a couple dates during the week. Yeup,I am not one of those chicks who lives for the freakin weekend, do whatever I want during the weekday and weekend,no biggie.
My dates were not all that,guys are so full of shit,wow-I hate I am slightly clairvoyant,my gift has been working overtime lately. I spent a couple afternoons with an old friend of mine, who claim that he wanted to start dating me. Yawn, heard that one before. He is cool to hang with, has great creative input for my business. But, him as my man,no way...geeesh.
Then I went out with this big greasy nigga,lol,I am sorry,this my diary, so I can say what in the hell I want...right,thank you. Well,he owns his own business too,so he rolls up in the Mercedes Benz,all cleaned up "for me". I was slightly impressed, until he said,"Mommie wants this don't she,you can have it boo,but we got to put all our money together in one big pot,so we split the pile". My eyes were bugged outa my head listening to this Faizon lookin negro tell me that I would have to give him my money, I make, to divide, man he was tripping. And just because you drive a Benz does not mean that I am going to just surrender my ass to you,hell nah big boy.
All last week, I got some random calls, all from lames. The tenderonie called to see if i would pick him up from work, I declined the ten bucks he offered as gas. I did not want to be bothered with him, and his foolishness. IF he had more than just dick to offer me, I might have entertained picking his string bean ass up, but nahhhh,he cannot get back where he use to be with me.
Non compliance is the word of the day.....the main reason why I do not allow certain men in my circle.
I am so waiting for my sweetie,fuck Daddy,or my present love interest to slip up with me. I am not anticipating it, but I can't be naive. I know he is not perfect. I trust him, only when he is in my presence...no different from the rest.
I only went out with the other two guys because I was bored, I wanted to see what they have been up to, and that is about it. Plus, the Faizon look-a-like filled up my tank cuz, he does stuff like that. The other friend held my camera for a clip I posted on my webpage, harmless.
My sweetie has a demanding work schedule, flexible only when he wants to do what he wants to do....you feel me. Men easily hide behind their work when someone or something is pulling on them, and for whatever reason they cannot make it...work is always the blame. OR, I love those who have kids and their Baby Moma pulls them every which way because they have a child or two in common. I do have sympathy, somewhat, but kinda hard to pull that card on a woman who cares for more than two children solo...with minimal family support.
Women are slick,lol,hellooo,I am one,lmao...using the child to dump guilt on the guy because he has to work to provide for his child and sometime that may include overtime, so he misses a recital or a game. I say,ladies, do not be hard on him,there are a lot of fathers who want to be there and cannot or some who have the opportunity, but still choose not to be the active parent. Count your blessings ladies,if he misses a lot of things then yeah, get in his ass, but if he has an legitimate excuse-nothing you can do,but play the role of both parents til things change. I had the life that involved an active father once upon a time,oh so long ago, but he did not work enough hours. Which caused financial strain on the family. Thus, why I had to get out and get my hustle on. He started to hate me, for whatever reason, we fought all the time because he was here all the time, getting in my ass for no damned reason...he became a drunk and I am so glad that part of my life is over, and my children were happy to see us split.
Anyway,geesh, I lost my focus there for a minute. Had a black woman flash back,lol....you know we think about the negative,never memories of the ex in a positive light.
LOL-is this what I am like without my Vitamin D,really,wow,I can be a real pain in the ass,wow,I got to get my dick really soon then. I need sex like four times a week, this is the number me and my pussy has came up with. It has to be fulfilling dammit, not some random shit. Something has got to give, now that I have started back having sex, so soon already,I feel like I am on a fucking schedule, not good, time to switch it up. Saturday fucking only,simply just won't do for me. I require to be sexed more often than a weekend fling. I can go without sex for good lengths, but once I get it, it has to be maintained because if my present partner cannot produce it as needed, he will either get replaced or I cut off sex entirely, to regroup and try months later.
I was so angry with my sweetie recently, but I kept my feelings to myself, but its so time to release those emotions. Either I write about it or we have angry sex, and that has not happened because when I see him...his face makes me happy...I forget why I was angry in the first place.
Like I said, last week was really shitty, and I really needed him my friend and lover to come by and see me. Schedule did not permit it, but still...I told him I am like a spoil brat when it comes to my time....grrrrr. I am pouting as I wrote this,yes, I am....lips poked out, eyes droopy,as a matter of fact my eyes are watery, like I am about to cry. I am horrible, yes I know.
I am now playing "I want your sex" by George Michael...shaking my hips,wearing nothing but some a pair of hipsters and a tank. I wish I was riding his dick while singing/dancing to this song,high energy. (SIGH)
Ha, I am such the succubus, I told him that, so he better watch out. I cannot wait til we do everything on my checklist,lol,starting with a role play session. I am going to show him how differently I treat him verse these other MF'ers that have had a chance to be in my presence.
The next thing on my list is to get fucked facing the city of Atlanta. Yes at a luxury hotel, on the balcony or windows wide open and I/we want to do a live sex cam show. He wants to sex me while others are viewing, oh that is so easy to do. I want him to "show off" to my wana be's, fans, admirers, and groupies. They will so envy him, and I will enjoy every moment of it.
Well, let me wrap up this writing, off to the next page,I have to rant a lil bit more.
Kisses to you,
~Dream~
