Users,Abusers,Givers,Takers-Which1Are You?
In life the classification of people can be broken into four categories:
User
Abuser
Giver
Taker
Everyone has their own definition of each,but I've taken the time to give some precise examples of each type.
The User: A person who uses or operates something (a machine or even another person). The typical user is either fully aware they are a user or their in denial about using people. Users have a constant void to fill. They feel power when they manipulate situations that benefit them.
The Abuser: Someone who regularly or habitually abuses someone or something,in particular. An abuser receives power from controlling a person who is emotionally bound to them. The abuser has no sense of self worth without someone to control. Abusers are very into self, and have a sickening type of arrogance.
The Giver: Someone who devotes themselves completely. The giver does without question and gives without seeking reciprocity. A giver is someone who lives to help others.
The Taker: A person who takes a specified thing. The taker can be someone who expects others to provide for them. A takers affixation is what that person can do for me. A taker is not concerned about an emotional attachment with an individual,its all about how they can benefit from knowing or being with this person.
Victims of each class will vary:
A person who seeks an emotional bond, they will often accept a sex based only relationship. This victim does not see themselves as vulnerable because they are strong minded people. People who just want to be accepted for who they are. -The User Victim
The abuse victim is someone who has poor self esteem, and is simply seeking anyone who will pay attention to them and who will show "love" to them. The attention they receive from a abuser can be a mixture of high energy sex,loads of quality time,and intervals of physical/emotional abuse (meaning-the abuse will come and go,they will be on a love/hate roller coaster)some do not care as long as they are not being ignored and the need for attention is met,"its ok". This person may also see the abuser as loving "they do care"because they show strong emotions toward them.-The Abuse Victim
A victim of someone who gives constantly, the results are guilt sometimes resentment toward the giver. The receiver can begin to question the giver,accusations can be that the giver does what they do for "self gratification". Very tricky,not often will there be victims of givers and actually most givers become victims if they give too often. People will take their kindness as a weakness (hence why they will get used).
A takers victims are usually people who want to help yet they have their limits to how much help their willing to give. Sexually,these individuals give a lot of passion in the bedroom. This person just wants to be happy in life,no matter what they do. The takers feed from their emotions. The majority of a takers victims are the givers.-The Taker Victim
A highly sexual,discreet,corporate woman begins to attend swinger parties. She is curious of the lifestyle and seeks a long term relationship. She knows the rules of the lifestyle, and respects it. She often has random encounters with fellow lifers and obtains friendships with the gents she brings home. The men are not seeking a relationship,yet,she yearns for the companionship from any fellow that spends a little time with her. Is she a giver or taker? Or is she a user or a taker victim?
A mother of five almost grown children, has been with the same man for more than two decades. She has never stepped outside of their relationship. He,on the other hand,has children outside of the relationship and has cheated on her numerous times. She rekindles a friendship with a former classmate, seeking conversation and guidance. An emotional bond is created with the classmate. She falls for him, and he gives her an ultimatum. She couldn't quickly decide, so the classmate cuts her off completely, choosing for her. Her long term boyfriend finds out about the other guy, and finds it hilarious that she (a lowly single Mom of five) would even try to seek consoling outside of their relationship. Is she an abuse victim or a giver? Is the Baby Father an abuser or a taker? Or could he be a giver and a taker? Is the former classmate a taker?
A married woman, her spouse has an established busy career. They own the home of their dreams,money in the bank,and they have vacationed at the most elite destinations. When you see the two, they appear happy. Far from the truth,many nights she has slept alone and countless days she has attended events without her husband. She does love him, they were college sweethearts, but the love she has for him is very thin. She drifts away from him emotionally, and seeks affection from another. Her husband knows she is having an affair, but chooses to ignore it, because he has been cheating for many years. Is the husband the abuser or is he the user? Is the wife the victim of a giver or is she the giver?
As you see, our roles in life will fluctuate and sometimes often will stay the same. No matter what character we are in this play we call life, we must accept our true identity. Hurt as less as possible, obtain as much as we can, seek knowledge daily and receive pleasure as much as possible-simple guidelines to follow, hard for most.
We are all led by our emotions-our genitals, cast out signals to our brains,leading us into the darkness or the light,all uncharted waters. Be careful when sailing, you never know what kind of weather (karma) is going to forecast.
Kisses to you,
~Dream~
